There are telltale signs that signal you and your partner could benefit from couples counseling.
Ongoing relationship distress is harmful to each romantic partner’s mental1 and physical wellbeing, and in addition, can negatively impact the kids.
We all know this.
Difficult conflict can lead to things being said that hurt us at our core. The growing emotional distance can leave us feeling like we are stranded on a boat in the middle of an ocean—desperate for connection, safety, and security.
The lack of commitment and trust perpetuates toxic interactions that push us farther away from each other, rather than building a bridge back to one another.
Fortunately, empirically-based couples therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl, has demonstrated that couples therapy can create a positive change for 70% of couples. And these changes actually last.
However, couples often do not seek research-based solutions to improve their relationship.
Here are some facts:
31% of couples take a premarital relationship education program.
Only 19% of couples actually seek out some form of couples therapy and only 37% of divorced couples worked with a professional prior to signing the papers.
The average couple waits six years before seeking professional help for marital problems.
Part of this may be due to the stigma against couples therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl. Below are just a few examples of this and how it can impact your relationship:
Thinking that going to couples therapy means that we, as a couple, are not strong enough to work through issues on our own. That there is something inherently wrong in our marriage. It’s a shame game.
Pretending the issues don’t exist and avoiding admitting and confronting problems that peek out of the closet in the relationship. Examples include nasty fights, emotional disconnection, or an affair.
Convincing ourselves that the real problem is our partner. So why go to therapy when they are the reason this marriage sucks? (Hint: Every relationship requires two people and so inevitably you are also involved).
Believing the myth that “if love takes work, then it wasn’t meant to be.” A no-effort relationship is not a great relationship. It’s a doomed one. Dr. John Gottman says, “Every [relationship] demands an effort to keep it on the right track; there is constant tension…between forces that hold you together and those that tear you apart.”
I won’t hide the fact that bringing up difficult issues in couples therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl, will be challenging, because it will be.
For example, a client mentioned that she was “overwhelmed with fear that bringing up issues in therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl, would only make things worse,” highlighting her conflict-avoidant style, but as the sessions went on and she began to experiment with bringing up more issues, she indicated, “it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. It’s nice not having to carry the burden alone.” And when both partners do their part and remain committed to the process and the relationship, the results of therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl, may create a better relationship.
Not pursuing couples therapy in Tampa Fl, and Brandon Fl, wellbeing can create bigger and more serious obstacles to overcome in the future. It’s like a large boulder rolling out of control down a hill. The farther it rolls, the more damage it causes and the harder it is to push it back to the place it belongs.