Have you ever been in an argument that you were so ready to tell the other person off because you just knew, without a doubt, that you were right?
Most of the time, the arguments that are the hardest to work out are the ones where both people are right. Both sides make a good point and they each make sense. So how do you decide what to do? What’s the next step? For some, they may try to avoid the situation. For others, they may continue to try to persuade the other person into thinking their way and when the other person doesn’t budge a brand new argument erupts. Sound familiar?
If you know the feelings behind their actions, it is easier to remedy the situation. Stop for a minute and think what the situation looks like from the outside looking in. Are you able to see from their perspective? Are you trying or even willing to stop trying to be right and understand what they are feeling… are they willing to do the same? We must learn to validate, rather than judge and dismiss other’s views and perspectives. Rather than judging others for “what” they think, maybe we can stop and look at their experiences that have led them to think that way in the first place. We all have our battles. We all have our challenges. We all are going through things that, often times, nobody else may know about. Be kind. Listen. Let’s let our guard down for just one moment and imagine what it would feel like to read what our partner, family member, friend is feeling and what they are trying to convey to us. While they may be saying hurtful things, try to look at the big picture. What may seem like anger and hate could actually be hurt and pain. Nobody wants to look weak. Meet them in the middle. Listen to understand, don’t listen to ask your next question. Give, receive, and celebrate as you go along.
Let us teach you the tools you need to enrich your relationships. Only you can decide when enough is enough.
Give us a call/text today: (813) 244-1251
Star Point Counseling